What Are You Doing That Matters?

This is such a simple question but sometimes hard to answer. How you answer it is completely up to you.  There are no right or wrong answers.  But it’s a helpful way to gauge what’s important to you, what you value, and how effectively you’re using your time.

It’s still very early in my journey with Create the Map, but my initial hypothesis is that people who are out creating their own paths in life are driven by a sense of purpose and the feeling that what they’re doing matters. For some, this might be as simple as exploring an idea further, creating something from nothing, or being a supportive friend or parent.  For others, it can be as deep as feeling like you are on a mission and that you’re acting on some kind of calling in life.

To me, it’s really just a matter of being clear with yourself about what matters to you, then doing more of that and less of the other stuff. Life can take on a whole new sense of meaning when you see that each day is an opportunity for you to do more of what matters.  Small, steady progress each day can lead to amazing results.  Spending just 15 minutes less each day on what doesn’t matter and using that towards what matters can make a huge difference.

I’m not talking about what makes you look good. Or feel good. I’m talking about what you believe deep inside really matters.  This also isn’t about what matters to other people.  It’s not about what matters to your family, your friends, or your significant other.  It’s about what matters to you, and it can be anything at all as long as it comes from you.  It’s something for you and you alone to own.

A Few Things That Matter to Me

To give you more of an idea of what I’m talking about, here are a few things I’m currently doing that matter to me:

• Being as supportive and loving of a fiancé, son, and friend as I can be
• Encouraging people around me to act on their ideas and unleash their creativity
• Building Create the Map
• Helping small business owners in my neighborhood feel less alone and more connected to each other

Let’s bring it back to you.  My real goal in writing this is to get you thinking about this question and to start doing more of what matters to you.  So on that note…..

If You Know What Matters to You

Fantastic!  Do more of that and less of the other stuff.  (Feel free to scroll down to “A Few Cautions.”)

If You Aren’t Sure What Matters to You

It’s okay.  You’re probably already doing more than you think.  Just sit with the question for a while.  You might be surprised to find an answer come to you when you least expect it.  If you’d rather take some kind of action, you could also spend some time writing freely for say 30 minutes, reflecting on the question to see if anything jumps out at you.  (If you decide to write, I suggest you literally type out the question at the top of the page before you start writing and keep glancing back at it as you type.)

Three Ways to Discover Meaning in Life

In 1946, a man named Viktor Frankl published a book called Man’s Search for Meaning.  Dr. Frankl had experienced the Nazi concentration camps firsthand as a prisoner during World War II  and observed the vital role that a sense of meaning played in helping those who survived endure the horrible experience.  In the book, he offers this advice that relates to discovering what matters: “We can discover this meaning in life in three different ways: (1) by creating a work or doing a deed; (2) by experiencing something or encountering someone; and (3) by the attitude we take toward unavoidable suffering.”*

A Few Cautions

1. What matters to you may change. Just because something matters to you now doesn’t mean you’re stuck with it the rest of your life.  Sure, there are probably some things that matter to you now that always will.  But there may be other things that matter to you that won’t matter much at all a few days, weeks, or years from now.  Dr. Frankl wrote that “The meaning of life differs from man to man, from day to day, and from hour to hour.  What matters, therefore, is not the meaning of life in general but rather the specific meaning of a person’s life at a given moment.”**  Don’t think you can just answer this question once and be done with it.
2. Be sure to have fun along the way. Don’t overthink it.  I’m not saying that every moment of your life must be spent fulfilling some higher purpose.  I’m also not advocating that you spend all your time journaling, looking inward, or reflecting until you find the perfect answer.  Life is meant to be lived.  And living requires action.  I’m just saying that it’s important to take your own pulse periodically to make sure you’re fulfilling your own sense of purpose and spending enough time doing what matters to you.
3. This isn’t meant to be a guilt trip or to make you sad. It’s also not meant to send you into some existential tailspin or awaken some quarterlife or midlife crisis.  It isn’t about what should matter to you; it’s about what does matter to you.  It can be as wild and crazy or as practical and average as you want.  Don’t waste your time comparing yourself to other people either.  You’re different from them.  This is just about making sure you’re spending time on the things that matter to you.  It’s your life.  And ultimately, how you use your time and what you do with it is completely up to you.

So tell me, what are you doing that matters?  If you feel like sharing, I’d love to hear in the comments below.

*Man’s Search for Meaning, Viktor Frankl, p. 133
**Man’s Search for Meaning, Viktor Frankl, p. 131
***About the photo above: That’s a picture I took of my fiancee Erin on August 27, 2010.  We took a weekend road trip to southwest Michigan, and this was the sunset we watched at Union Pier our first night there.

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